Confident, Not Cocky: Shalom Lamm on Leading with Humility and Strength
In the world of entrepreneurship, confidence is considered a must. Founders pitch to investors with bold visions, lead teams into uncertainty, and make tough decisions every day. But there’s a fine—and often dangerous—line between confidence and arrogance. According to entrepreneur Shalom Lamm, knowing the difference isn’t just a matter of personality. It’s a key factor in long-term leadership success.
“People will follow a confident leader. They’ll tolerate an arrogant one—until they won’t,” says Lamm. “Sustainable leadership is rooted in self-awareness and respect.”
In this post, we’ll explore how to walk the delicate line between believing in yourself and overestimating yourself, with wisdom from Shalom Lamm’s entrepreneurial journey.
Why Confidence Is Crucial for Leadership
Confidence is the foundation of influence. A leader who exudes calm assurance can rally a team through uncertainty, attract investor buy-in, and create clarity during chaos. Confidence allows leaders to:
- Make swift, informed decisions
- Encourage innovation and risk-taking
- Inspire trust and loyalty
- Maintain composure under pressure
As Shalom Lamm explains, “If you don’t believe in your vision, no one else will.”
But confidence doesn’t mean being the loudest voice in the room or always thinking you’re right. It’s about conviction balanced by openness—a trait that sets great leaders apart.
Where Confidence Turns Into Arrogance
Arrogance, on the other hand, masquerades as confidence. It’s driven not by conviction but by ego. An arrogant leader:
- Dismisses feedback
- Believes they are always right
- Prioritizes being right over being effective
- Seeks recognition more than results
- Undermines or devalues team members
According to Lamm, arrogance often stems from insecurity disguised as dominance.
“The moment you stop listening, you stop growing. And in business, that’s the beginning of the end.”
Arrogance creates toxic cultures, high turnover, and stunted innovation. In contrast, confident leaders invite collaboration and adapt to change—two ingredients essential to entrepreneurial survival.
How to Spot the Difference in Yourself
If you’re in a leadership role, it can be hard to tell when your confidence has tipped too far. Here are some reflection questions inspired by Shalom Lamm’s leadership philosophy:
- Do you actively seek feedback—even if it’s uncomfortable?
- Are you open to changing your mind when new information emerges?
- Do your team members feel safe disagreeing with you?
- Do you credit your team’s effort, or do you take all the praise?
- When something goes wrong, do you take ownership—or point fingers?
If any of these give you pause, it might be time for a reset.
The Power of Humility in Leadership
Humility is not the opposite of confidence—it’s its strongest companion. Shalom Lamm argues that the best leaders are those who lead from a place of service, not superiority.
“True confidence is quiet. It doesn’t need validation because it’s built on substance,” he notes.
Humble leaders:
- Admit when they don’t know something
- Give credit where it’s due
- Are quick to apologize and slow to blame
- Listen more than they speak
- Build strong, empowered teams
These are the leaders people want to follow—not just for one project, but for a career.
Walking the Line: Practical Strategies
Here are some ways to stay confident without tipping into arrogance:
- Invite dissent: Make space for disagreement. It’s a sign of a healthy culture.
- Lead with questions, not statements: Curious leaders build better strategies.
- Credit the team, own the mistakes: It builds morale and earns respect.
- Regularly ask for feedback: Not just in reviews—create ongoing channels.
- Stay grounded in purpose: Let your mission guide your decisions, not your ego.
Shalom Lamm credits much of his leadership growth to remaining curious, even after years of experience. “The moment you think you’ve arrived,” he warns, “you’ve already started falling behind.”
Final Thoughts: Strength in Balance
In the fast-paced world of entrepreneurship, confidence will help you move forward—but humility will ensure others come with you. As Shalom Lamm demonstrates, the most enduring leaders are those who lead not from a pedestal, but from among their people.
So walk that line carefully. Be bold, be brave—but never too proud to listen, learn, or admit you’re wrong. In the end, your legacy as a leader won’t be built on bravado—it’ll be built on how you made people feel, grow, and believe.
