When Employers Guilt-Trip Departing Employees: A Troubling Workplace Trend

Photo by Kelly Sikkema

A viral TikTok video by user D’Shonda Brown has ignited a widespread conversation about how employers handle resignations. In the video, which has amassed thousands of views and comments, Brown asserts, “Jobs and corporations don’t treat us with the same respect and loyalty that they expect us to give them.” Her statement resonates with many who have faced retaliation after submitting their two weeks’ notice.

Underneath Brown’s post, countless individuals share unsettling experiences of being mistreated during their final days at a job. Reports range from being assigned menial “busy work” to being abruptly dismissed before the notice period ends. These actions often leave employees feeling undervalued and disrespected at a pivotal moment in their professional journey.

A Pattern of Retaliation

Sarah Mitchell, a graphic designer from Portland, recounted her experience: “After I handed in my resignation, my manager started excluding me from important meetings and projects. It was like I ceased to exist overnight.” Similarly, Marcus Lewis, a sales representative in Chicago, was told to pack up and leave the same day he gave notice. “I wanted to ensure a smooth transition, but they didn’t even give me the chance,” he said.

These stories highlight a pattern where some employers, perhaps feeling betrayed or inconvenienced, react negatively to an employee’s decision to move on. Instead of fostering a supportive environment, they resort to guilt-tripping or punitive measures.

Understanding the Employer’s Perspective

While these reactions are problematic, it’s important to consider the pressures managers face. “I think most managers can agree that receiving a letter of resignation from an employee feels like a shot to the chest,” says A.J. Mizes, CEO and Founder of The Human Reach, an executive coaching firm. “You immediately start assessing how to redistribute workloads, plan for hiring, and worry about the impact on team morale.”

Despite these legitimate concerns, Mizes emphasizes that taking frustrations out on the departing employee is counterproductive. “There’s often a negative aura surrounding a two weeks’ notice, but allowing that to dictate your behavior undermines the professional environment you’ve worked hard to create.”

The Impact on Workplace Culture

Negative reactions to resignations don’t just affect the individual leaving—they ripple throughout the entire organization. Remaining employees witness how their colleague is treated and may question their own value within the company. This can lead to decreased morale, lower productivity, and even increased turnover as others seek more supportive work environments.

“Employees talk, and word spreads quickly,” notes Dr. Elena Ramirez, an organizational psychologist. “If a company develops a reputation for mistreating staff during their resignation period, it can deter top talent from joining and encourage current employees to keep an eye out for other opportunities.”

A Call for Compassionate Leadership

Mizes advocates for a more empathetic approach. “It can be difficult to see an employee go, but the way a manager handles a resignation should reflect the work culture they aim to cultivate,” he explains. “Taking out your frustration on someone because they’ve found a better opportunity is unacceptable. Instead, view it as a chance to celebrate their growth and contributions.”

He adds, “As executives and managers, we should encourage the career advancement of our employees, even if it leads them elsewhere. This not only supports the individual but also reinforces a positive, growth-oriented culture within the organization.”

Best Practices for Managing Resignations

To navigate employee departures effectively, experts suggest the following strategies:

• Express Gratitude: Acknowledge the employee’s contributions and thank them sincerely. This leaves a positive final impression and maintains a professional relationship.
• Facilitate a Smooth Transition: Collaborate on a plan to transfer responsibilities. This ensures continuity and demonstrates respect for the team’s workload.
• Maintain Professionalism: Continue to include the departing employee in relevant communications and activities during their notice period.
• Seek Constructive Feedback: Use exit interviews as an opportunity to gain insights into workplace improvements.

The Role of Executive Coaching

Organizations like The Human Reach specialize in helping leaders develop the skills necessary to handle such transitions gracefully. “We offer executive coaching that focuses on emotional intelligence, effective communication, and building a positive workplace culture,” says Mizes. “By investing in these areas, managers can better support their teams through changes.”

The Employee’s Perspective

From the employee’s standpoint, a supportive resignation process can significantly impact their future career. “Leaving on good terms preserves professional networks and can lead to positive references down the line,” notes career consultant Lisa Patel. “It’s in everyone’s best interest to handle resignations respectfully.”

Moving Forward

As conversations like the one sparked by Brown’s TikTok video gain traction, it’s clear that employees are seeking workplaces where they are valued holistically. Companies have an opportunity to reflect on their practices and make adjustments that prioritize respect and dignity.

“Ultimately, how we respond to an employee’s decision to leave speaks volumes about our leadership and organizational values,” says Mizes. “By approaching resignations with compassion and professionalism, we foster a culture that not only retains talent but also attracts it.”

Navigating the departure of an employee is undoubtedly challenging. However, resorting to guilt trips or punitive actions is detrimental to both the individual and the organization. By embracing a supportive approach, employers can maintain a positive work environment, encourage open communication, and uphold their reputation in the industry.

For managers seeking guidance on fostering such a culture, resources like executive coaching are available to provide the necessary tools and strategies. As the workforce continues to evolve, prioritizing empathy and respect will be key to organizational success.